Really, they must make a movie out of us!

A silly title, I know, but I just can't help myself.  I was looking at my last posts and realized that I hadn't yet told my latest ovulation story.  Compared to all the other wild and crazy things that happen on this ride, I suppose it isn't much, but it still makes me roll my eyes and laugh every time I play it back in my head, so here it is.

I have been in contact with my fertility nurse since I noticed EWCM about two weeks ago.  Now, because my ovaries, or follicles, or hormones move at a snail's speed, this wonderful fertile fluid is there for about a week prior to ovulation.  When I first called two weeks ago, she advised me to make an appointment the following Tuesday (which would be 7 days after I had first noticed EWCM) for a progesterone test.

The Tuesday of the appointment rolled around and I was in a funk.  I drove to work crabby--I was somewhere in between angry and sad, as one could tell by my fierce music but flowing tears.  Oh, what infertility does to a girl!  I was angry because after first seeing the EWCM, I had begun using OPKs and had not received a positive (and positively adorable) little smiley face yet.  My EWCM was still there and I was absolutely positive that I hadn't ovulated yet.  After charting this for year, I think I know a thing or two about ovulation.  Indeed, the charting has awoken me to so many signs my body gives to signal ovulation that I would have never otherwise noticed.  It is amazing! I was angry because I felt I had to go to this appointment, but I knew that the progesterone test would show that I hadn't ovulated, because... uh... I hadn't ovulated!  I was sad because it just felt like another hurdle to have to jump over and honestly, my stamina for this relay race is waning.

At lunch, when it came time to leave to get poked and prodded once again, I decided that I would take one more OPK test, just in case.  And here starts the comedy...

As a teacher, I run to the bathroom, only to find the staff bathroom is still out of order.  I quickly decide to use the student bathroom--you know, the one where the toilet is roughly one foot off the floor?  So there I am, squatting over this miniature toilet, peeing on a stick.  I didn't have time to wait for the result, so I carefully placed it right side up in my purse and scurried out to my car.  Once in the car, I put the stick on the passenger seat, just so I could see the result when it popped up.

I look down and screeeeech!  Slam on my breaks!  Of course, wouldn't you know that there is now a smiley face looking up at me, signaling that yes, I have finally begun to gear up to ovulate!  With the loud, screeching tires, everyone on the playground looks up and the adults start walking over to check if everything is alright.  

image from google images

I have no idea why my response was to slam on my breaks, but I am glad no one was behind me!  I pulled out onto the street and with a U-turn pulled right back into the parking lot and my parking space.  Once inside, I called the office to cancel my appointment and schedule another for a week later, now presumably 7 days after ovulation.

A little comical, I think.  I still don't know if I did or did not ovulate.  Can I ovulate on my own after not ovulating with Clomid?  I guess so?  Can you get a positive OPK but not ovulate?  I think so?  I have no idea what my little anomaly of a body is up to,  but I am hoping that tomorrow's progesterone appointment provides much less drama!

Any crazy fertility stories out there that make you feel as if you are in the middle of a comedy or drama?  Please share!  I've got a ton!