REALLY???

I feel as though I should be writing deep, moving posts lately.  After all, I am processing a lot of emotions and quickly becoming comfortable with many new infertility treatments I swore off mere days ago.  But sometimes, when so much is going on, you just have to state the facts.  The rest of me seems too muddled and jumbled right now to do much more than simply state the facts.

So today, the fact is, that my body is REALLY pissing me off!  And, as the crazy infertile that I am, that talks to her someday children, trying to coax them down into her belly, I am now talking to chastising my body.  It plays out as a segment of SNL's weekend update:  Seth & Amy's REALLY? bit.

image via google images

Really, body?  You decide to resist the Clomid's effects, but still grow some follicles, and produce enough E2 for a good reading that brings relief and a smile?  Really?  You decide to let the follicles keep growing, but forget to fill them with eggs, as the plummeting second E2 reading shows, resulting in a canceled cycle?  Really?  And now, when we have counted this cycle as a wash--reproductively, financially, emotionally--you decide to produce a plethora of fertile fluid?  REALLY?  REALLY?

What's a girl to think, body?  You're kind of being an asshole!

hmmm . . . in light of all this fertile fluid do I start up OPK kits?  Make appointments?  Have baby sex?  Hope?   . . . so lost in all of this!